In 10th grade, I met my first and only high school crush.
He was thin, about my height, and (stud)ious enough to embody his own brand of a much sought after spy.
“The name is Con. Lexicon.
I like my brain tonic, shaken not stirred.”
(Personally, the man’s puny arm joke would be a perfect pun-pleasing, pickup line. Tongue twister FTW!)
Back to the story. The very first time he spoke to me, I fell in love with the way his glasses magnified the size of his eyes and how he would only talk about homework and projects.
(At this point, the readers may barf if they so desire.)
It is probably true that he had no interest in me, but that is precisely what drew me even closer to him. The only times he may have initiated conversation would be to ask me about my scores in a recent exam or what books I was using to study for a particular assignment. But there was something about his demeanor and decency which was radiating from his being that completely floored me in one go. It was the kind of diligence I saw in my father, a man who would shudder at the thought of taking a vacation day from work, unless it was mandated by the government or he was kidnapped by aliens. Even then he would find a way to work from home or outer space.
One day, the Physics teacher was handing back graded test papers to the class in alphabetical order. When the teacher called out his name to pickup his paper from the front desk, no one walked up. Realizing his absence, the teacher asked, “Can anyone of Rasagy’s friends come up and take his paper on his behalf?”
My human antenna started going berserk upon hearing the teacher’s request. It was my one chance to hold something that belonged to my crush and for all of us that have previously dealt with infatuations in our lifetime, it’s a pretty big deal.
Just think of the possibilities.
You have something that belongs to your crush. You have the chance to give it back to your crush in lieu for added conversation that may lead to something more like a smile which then leads to a hug which then leads to a romantic liaison then marriage, children and grandchildren etc.
OK, maybe that’s not always the queue of things but your teenage love hormones have a way of making your brain go into an overdrive.
As I was slowly receding back into reality, another classmate raised her hand to take his paper. A bit of jealously swelled up inside me at the thought of another girl showing interest in him. I shot up my hand and won by a fraction of a second which was as close as the deciding factor between Phelps winning the gold or silver at the Olympics and joyously received my prize at the podium.
Moments later, I stashed his paper inside my backpack and reveled in the joy of treasuring it at home.
He scored one point higher than me in the Physics final.
I smiled because this would mean that he would be even more overjoyed upon receiving his paper back from me. However, all I could concentrate on was his beautiful handwriting; how all his answers were beautifully captured in the answer box; how all his equations were neatly derived, almost as if he didn’t need to make use of an eraser. I felt so close to him by holding his paper in my arms; so close that I saw a reflection of myself in the mirror facing me in my room and immediately felt stupid.
He didn’t show up again the following day and I felt disappointed with each passing period. To my joy, he was present the day after and I made my move to give him his test paper.
“Yes, I beat you in Physics!” was his only response, in addition to “Why is my paper so crumply?”
“The teacher gave it to me like that,” I hastily replied.
I was genuinely content just by hearing him speak.
By the end of the year, my infatuation receded when the teacher announced the topper of our class. I beat my own crush by a close margin. lulz.
The following year, all sections got moved around like a herd of buffaloes segregated by the final results duly stamped on our holy asses. And with that ended my imaginary love affair with the bespectacled boy.
p.s. If I had known that scoring well would lead me into a “superability” section, I would have gladly failed in an exam or two. (Another blog post reserved for that topic at a later time frame. 🙂 )