The Power of Saying “No”

In our effort to be likeable/popular/easy-going, we may forget that we have the powerful choice to say “No” if we are not interested.

Let me demonstrate some hypothetical situations, with a touch of wacky saki humor. Perhaps you have experienced these instances in your own life and this list may help you exercise your freedom and better voice your stand.

At work…

It’s 7pm on a Friday. Your boss: “Hey subordinate creature, can you double-check these 984662 files for me? Oh, and they are due first thing Monday morning.”

At a house soiree…

Your guest: “Would you have that bread in wheat-free, gluten-free, sugar-free version? And that oil made with the freshest olives from the fertile hills of Tuscany? And some green tea from Dalai Lama’s backyard?”

At a bookstore…

A so-called literary enthusiast : “Did you read 50 shades of ….”

At the zoo…

Your friend: “Wanna go to the snakes exhibit? I heard you can see a live performance of a big yellow boa constrictor ingest a mouse in front of your eyes.”

At a bar/club..

A stranger: “How bout you take off your silent mode and we get into vibrator mode on the dance floor?”

At a movie theater…

A fellow movie-goer: “Hey, would you mind moving to the next seat? I want to sit next to my girlfriend/boyfriend so we can make out during the entire movie.”

At a mall…

Your shop-a-holic friend: “Hey, let’s go to Hollister/Aeropostale!” (In the former, you come out with a shopping bag picturing a naked, smoldering Adonis and in the latter, the intoxicating fumes of perfume are lethal enough to kill a lab rat)

At a high school reunion…

Some lukkha/”I’m working in my daddy’s bijiness”/spoiled brat: “Hey, remember me? I was that uber-cool drug addict who made all the crappy jokes from the back of our class.”

At the gym…

Who am I kidding? I am too lazy to go to one.

On the subway…

When a pregnant lady with two large suitcases, a baby stroller and a bandaged arm stands helplessly, just as you manage to find seating for one of your buttocks:-

Jokes apart, we have all been in situations where we become complacent to the need of others in order to maintain an affable personality, even though we would be better off by saying “No.”

Of course, saying “No” to your boss’s dictator-like work ethic is not an ideal example, but there are some examples where we must use our voice to do what we feel is right for us. This can include saying “No” to unwarranted interest from strangers, or accepting drugs from friends, or even something as simple as saving time for ourselves, instead of wasting it on crappy activities with the wrong company. On that note of drugs, teenagers are most vulnerable to addicting habits from cigarettes and toxic drugs due to peer pressure from friends in their social circle. Adherence to their friend’s habits leads to serious repercussions to their own mental and physical health. This is where campaigns like D.A.R.E (Drug Abuse Resistance Education) are crucial to keeping kids drug-free. The bar example is also a critical one because some women complain of being pestered by aggressive men, even after she has stated her “No” position to his flirtatious attempts.

In short, it is better to state your answer upfront, rather than letting other people take advantage of you.

Hope you enjoyed this post.

So folks, what will you say to people who ask you do things that you are not comfortable with? 😉